Category: Comedy

  • The Nerd List

    What movies or TV series have you watched more than 5 times?

    Oh, I got a list alright. Prepare yourself for the Nerd List:

    The Simpsons

    Scooby Doo

    Alien

    Aliens

    Star Wars (all of non Disney movies except for Rogue One)

    Predator

    The Lord of the Rings

    The Indiana Jones original trilogy

    Anchorman

    Beetlejuice

    Terminator 1 and 2

    The Matrix

    Airplane!

    The Thing

    Halloween

    Dawn of the Dead

    Pee Wee’s Big Adventure

    Seinfeld

    Family Guy

    Goodfellas

    Forrest Gump

    The Exorcist

    Fright Night

    The 40 Year Old Virgin

    Fargo

    The Big Lebowski

    Silence of the Lambs

    The Cosby Show

    American Werewolf in London

    Edward Scissorhands

    There’s probably more movies and shows I forgot to list, but these are the main ones. Note that there isn’t many indie movies or art films among the list. Some foreign films I only saw once.

  • HL Mencken: 14 Great Quotes

    HL Mencken: 14 Great Quotes

    Henry Louis Mencken (1880-1956) was one of the greatest journalists, essayists, and cultural cititics of the 20th Century. Here are some of the best quotes by H.L. Mencken, along with their sources:

    1. **”For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong.”***Source:* Often attributed to Mencken; appears in various writings but exact origin is uncertain.

    2. **”The most dangerous man to any government is the man who is able to think things out for himself.”***Source:* *The American Mercury*, 1926.

    3. **”Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard.”***Source:* *Notes on Democracy*, 1926.

    4. **”Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.”***Source:* Attributed in various works; exact source uncertain but reflects Mencken’s critiques of morality.

    5. **”No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.”***Source:* *The American Mercury*, 1920s.

    6. **”Nobody ever lost a dollar by underestimating the taste of the American public.”***Source:* Similar in theme to above; from Mencken’s critiques of popular culture.

    7. **”The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”***Source:* *In Defense of Women*, 1918.

    8. **”On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart’s desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”***Source:* *The American Mercury*, 1920.

    9. **”The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule it.”***Source:* From Mencken’s commentary on social movements, particularly in *The American Mercury*.

    10. **”In every man under thirty there is a lawless anarchist, and in every man over thirty there is a conformist coward.”***Source:* From Mencken’s *A Mencken Chrestomathy* (1949).

    11. “An idealist is a person who helps other people to be prosperous.”— Source: From Mencken’s writings on social criticism and human nature.

    12. **”It is the dull man who is always sure, and the sure man who is always dull.”***Source:* From *The American Mercury*, December 1925.

    13. **”The education of a man is never completed until he dies.”***Source:* Paraphrased from Mencken’s writings on education and lifelong learning.

    14. **”Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.”***Source:* From *The American Mercury*, 1925.

    These quotes showcase Mencken’s sharp wit and often cynical view of politics, society, and human nature. For full context, many are found in his essays and articles published primarily in *The American Mercury* magazine during the 1920s.

  • Carry the Bear Spray Around Me

    Which animal would you compare yourself to and why?

    The bear comes easy as an answer, and I guess I’m more like a black bear than a brown or polar bear, or any of the other species. Let me explain the ways:

    I’m fairly big and hairy, with dark fur. I can eat a lot, and I gained some weight for the winter. I’ll try to lose it in coming months. I tend to be less active and sleep more during the winters, almost like a state of torpor hibernation.

    I’m fairly docile and sometimes even timid, except when I’m not. I will flee threats in most cases, but I will fight back if cornered or to protect the ones I care about.

    What else? I tend to be picky about what I eat, but I like tasty high fat, sugary, and salty foods. I can eat a whole lot of berries. I’m not much of a runner, but I can sprint at times.

    I lived in (man) caves, and often alone (not always).

    So I’m somewhat cuddly and somewhat deadly. LOOK OUT!🐻

  • York The Dork

    What is your middle name? Does it carry any special meaning/significance?

    York is my middle name, and it was my father’s first name. I think one of my nephews also has that middle name.

    The name is ancient, and it evolved from the Brittonic Celtic word Eboracon, which I read means Yew Tree Place. It has British and Norse origins. Of course, there’s modern cities with either York as a full name or part of the name. British-American usage in the modern world.

    My first name means a channel of water, my middle name means an area of a bunch of trees, and my last name comes from one of the main disciples of The Nazarene. Maybe it has some significance, but I doubt my parents put that much thought into my full name.

    So yes, I probably have some British and Scandinavian ancestry, base on ancestry research I’ve done on my dad’s side of the family. But York is an unusual name in modern times. I sometimes make jokes about my middle name or middle initial.

    I had no idea how Eburācon became Eboracum, then Eoforwīc, then Jórvík, and finally York. They don’t even have much similarity, and I never encountered those specific words before.

    Yes, I had to use the internet to research the origin of my second name: A place of Yew Trees. What the hell is that?!

  • The Curse of being Atypical.

    What bores you?

    So, what bores me? It’s more like what doesn’t bore me. I have been more selective of how I spend my free time.

    Formal education bores me. I went to school for several years, including a technical college and university. Going to lectures, listening to 2 or 3 professors or teaching assistants per day lecture for hours at a time, sometimes reading about subjects that can be tedious. It often took an innovative or charismatic teacher for me to pay attention in class, or I took a course that I have familiarity and interest in.

    Sports bore me. While some people find athletic teams and individuals fascinating, I often don’t. It’s more like I count how many sport injuries can happen during a game or match.

    Many television shows and oftentimes movies can bore me. Television comedies seem to be my go-to, but it has to be very funny for me to keep sustained interest.

    While I used to like movies, I think I saw so many over decades that I can predict plot twists and movie tropes. I maybe see one or 2 movies a year now, and they tend to be the blockbuster type of film. I was bored seeing the second Avatar movie, it was so long.

    I read everyday, but I find books boring now. I don’t think I have the attention span to read novels, but I will read the occasional non-fiction book. I may not finish though, but I will read up on summaries and profound quotes after. And certain articles are Too Long; Didn’t Read, so I’ll skip to the last 2 paragraphs.

    I tended to job hop after 18 months-2 years in most cases, cuz I would grow bored with the routine over time. I would get excited at first once I got a job, I would then learn the routines, and over time have contempt over the routine. And often the pay wasn’t good enough for me to tolerate the stress and boredom and stay longer.

    What else? Some music genres can be uninteresting for me, like Country music, Folk, Jazz. While I was a fan of the early days of Rap and HipHop, it seems like even the modern artists these days are going through the motions.

    I partly left the US cuz I found my newer residence boring. When shopping and eating are the main pastimes there, I was ready to move after 5 years. Nice weather though.

    Maybe it’s me. I lived too long, had my fill of experiences, and became burnt out and world weary. It’s harder to find interesting things about living on Earth. I will probably dabble more in virtual reality in the near future, if I can afford it. Longing for the Holo-Deck, or Death. Whichever comes first….

  • ShowTime Pizza!

    ShowTime Pizza!

    Share one of the best gifts you’ve ever received.

    I went to ShowTime Pizza Place as a kid, likely after getting on my parents’ case begging to go. I remember being told no more than once, they can’t afford it. Understandable now, I didn’t understand at 8 years old. 50$ was a bigger chunk of change then.

    ShowTime Pizza was a family friendly Pizzeria with a gimmick. It had a video game arcade with many of the most popular cabinet video games at the time- Pac-Man, Space Invaders, Donkey Kong, Joust, Defender, Burger Time, Sinistar and so on. Maybe some more obscure games that I don’t remember playing.

    It also had a dining hall with a stage featuring singing and talking Animatronic Animal Characters, like Billy Bob Brockali, Looney Bird, Rolfe DeWolfe, and various other animal characters. These animatronic characters, along with the Chuck E Cheese Animatronics, were the inspiration for the antagonistic robots in Five Nights at Freddies “horror” movies and video games.

    No, I never thought the animatronics were creepy. I thought of the furry characters as robots, which I continue to be fascinated by.

    Anyways, my parents gave in, and I was able to go to ShowBiz Pizza Place for my 9th birthday. I remember the Pepperoni pizza and pitchers of Pepsi were tasty enough for a grade school kid. I remember being proud that I could eat 4 slices of pizza then.

    I loved the video games, of course, and tried and failed to play the Legendary laser disk game Dragon’s Lair. I loved the Don Bluth animation, and that game ate up many of the tokens my parents gave me. I couldnt go far with that game though.

    But what I remember the most about that pizza party at ShowBiz Pizza, was during the birthday meal, “The Rock-afire Explosion” band “talked and sang” to me directly to wish me a happy birthday. And I remember being touched by the nice gesture and being near tears that my parents cared enough about me to arrange the birthday shout-out with the Pizzeria staff.

    So, yes, I enjoyed my time at ShowBiz Pizza, and I understand that it later merged With Chuck E. Cheese Pizza. One of those nostalgic fond memories, and it also contributed to my interests in robots, video games, comedy, and good food.

  • “Fun times”

    List five things you do for fun.

    1. Listen to music. Bangers and the occasional classic rock, disco, and pop song.

    2. Watch comedy bits, like funny scenes from movies and TV shows, and comedy bits from stand up.

    3. Eat comfort food. Fast food, junk food, cheaper yet tasty food.

    4. Nightlife- clubs, bars, and lounges. Sometimes concerts. It’s getting less fun as I get older.

    5. Private vices. I gave up one, but not the other. I may take up the other one again if I can find a reliable plug. 😉 2026 isn’t looking much better than 2025 so far.

  • Nope, not for me

    What are your thoughts on the concept of living a very long life?

    There’s that famous quote from Woody Allen, which I will paraphrase, “You can live to be 100, if you give up all of the things that make you want to live to be 100.” That aligns with my own philosophy.

    I would argue that longevity is causing more problems than it solves, although there are some exceptions with some individuals. Like there’s some centenarian individuals still working, still in decent health, still active, and have a good mindset. They seem to be uncommon among the elderly though. There’s various ailments associated with advanced age, including dementia and cancer.

    I smoke, drink, eat the less healthy food at times, and don’t exercise as much as I should. And I’m coping with serious existential problems, along with millions of others. I’m already world weary. I’ll probably make it to my 70s or possibly 80s, and I’m fine with that. Any longer, I may become more reckless with my health, like eat Fugu Sushi or dance badly in traffic.

  • Yakisoba Recipe (Japanese Stir Fry with Noodles)

    Yakisoba Recipe (Japanese Stir Fry with Noodles)

    Japanese Stir Fry with Noodles (Yakisoba) is a versatile, tasty, affordable, and nutritious meal. The beauty of it is that it’s fairly easy to make, and there’s variations in the ingredients. Different types of meat, sauces, noodles, and vegetables can be used to make this dish. Vegetarian options are even possible. Let’s get started.

    Pound of meat, cut in bite sized pieces, and cooked thoroughly in a pot, wok, or large saucepan. Tougher cuts of meat should be marinated for a span of 2 to 12 hours first to improve flavor and tenderness.

    8 ounces of desired pasta, cooked thoroughly in boiling water and a splash of cooking  oil until tender yet firm. Drain excess water

    Slices of desired vegetables (onions, green peppers, cabbage, snap peas, green beans, and so on.)

    Splashes of cooking oil to brown the meat and cook vegetables

    Choice of sauce (Oyster, Fish Sauce, Soy Sauce, Hoisin, Teriyaki)

    Meat variations:

    Ground beef, or diced steak of any cut. It’s best to marinate steak first in soy, teriyaki, fish, or oyster sauce for 2 to 12 hours first. Ground beef marination isn’t needed.

    Chicken. Boneless chicken breast works best, but pieces of chicken baked or fried thoroughly and then deboned will also work.

    Seafood: Shrimp works best, but diced cuts of fish, prawns, or even pieces or lobster and crab meat could work.

    Turkey: Ground turkey works best (and is most affordable), but pieces of meat from a thoroughly cooked turkey will also do.

    Pork: diced pork from roast, chops, or tenderloin will be best. While Ham could possibly work, it’s not recommended.

    Tofu can be a meat substitute, or not adding any animal protein at all are also options

    Sauce Variations:

    Oyster sauce is traditionally used as the sauce in Japan, but Teriyaki, Fish Sauce, Soy Sauce, Hoisin, and Chilli Crisp sauce can also be used. The sauce can also marinate tougher cuts of meat, like with steak and pork. Just cut up pieces of meat to bite sized pieces, place in a bowl or another container, add the desired sauce, cover, and marinate the mixture for at least 2.hours. Up to 12 hours for even more flavorful and tender meat.

    I personally add a few splashes of hot sauce to the stir fry while cooking, which gives the meal an extra kick. But this is an optional ingredient, and not everyone prefers spice in their meals.

    Vegetables Variations:

    There is a variety of different vegetables that can be added to a stir fry. A basic Yakisoba will use sliced onions, but bite sized pieces of green peppers, carrots, green beans, bamboo shoots, broccoli, snap peas, cabbage, sliced mushrooms, bean sprouts, baby corn, and water chestnuts can be added. Any mixture will work. I personally use frozen mixed vegetables of corn, green beans, peas, , and diced carrots to the stir fry for convenience and affordability.

    Additional ingredients:

    I personally add about half a tablespoon of garlic powder to my version of Yakisoba, but there’s variations. Some people may add ginger, ground ginseng, a little black pepper, curry powder, or even chili powder to their meals.

    Pasta:

    Spaghetti, egg noodles, or linguine can be used, but really almost any kind of pasta will work. I’ve made Yakisoba using Rotini, Fussili, and Penne before. It may change the appearance and texture of the meal, but the nutrition and taste remain the same.

    Directions:
    Boil pasta, drain and set aside, brown meat, add a splash or 2 of sauce, add veggies and stir until desired, add desired spices, add cooked noodles, add splashes of more sauce until properly coated, stir until done. Should be enough food for 1 to 4 people.

    There’s different ways to make Yakisoba, so experiment and find the version that works best for you. I personally like using ground beef or turkey, soy sauce, a little hot sauce, spaghetti noodles, onion slices, and frozen mixed vegetables. It cooks quickly , tastes good, and is filling.

    I learned how to make a variation of Yakisoba in the military, and have been making variations of it years later. I always enjoyed making it, and in most cases I finished it by myself.  Yes, I need to lose weight. Enjoy!

    My version of Yakisoba.

  • Adorable Animals and Children.

    When are you most happy?

    I have severe depression and moments of anxiety, so it’s a struggle to be happy in middle age. Especially knowing what I know. However, there are bright spots that I live for. I really like comedy, even though I find it hard to laugh at most comedy. I tend to find sight gags and written jokes funnier than most stand up comedy. And I tend to lean more towards dark humor.

    Music is a bright spot, especially if it’s a banger. I like a lot of the R&B/Funk/Disco type of EDM, if it’s original work or samples older songs I haven’t heard before.

    But cute and friendly dogs and cats, and adorable children? When I’m around them, I can be funny and sometimes even giddy. I’m one of those people who watches funny cat, dog, and baby videos. When I’m around dogs, cats, cute animals and babies, I can sing funny ditties, tell jokes, pet and/or cuddle, and sometimes feed pets or children. My mindset changes, and I feel better, if temporarily.

    I have a daughter now, less than a year old, and she really is adorable. So it brightens my day when I see her or when I’m with her.