“Do you have any money you could give me/us?”

There’s variations of this question, but it’s a common one that happens the most often that irks me. Homeless or needy people asking me for any help I can offer. Advertising, political ads, and fundraisers asking me for buy or give. Sometimes friends or family will ask me to help them out. There’s various other examples.

I have a limited income, and while it’s enough to support myself, I have to go without certain indulgences. I try to be frugal and yet I can be generous at times

The problem is, while I can be generous and have a history of volunteering, there’s limits to my generosity. Like, I can give 2$ to a panhandler at times, but I can’t give the person 20$ or more. At least not too often. I definitely can’t buy the person a new home or even a hotel room for the night. And I can’t afford to give 2$ to 20 or more panhandlers in a day. That has happened before when I’m in cities.

Another example. There is an annual pledge drive from a famous website that I and millions of others use and appreciate. I have donated smaller amounts at times, but I can’t afford to do larger donations every year. I also can’t afford to give to various fundraisers, only maybe one or 2 per year. There’s times when my bank account is close to going negative.

I have a hard time saying “no”. There’s often a social pressure to say yes and give money to help others, buy certain products or services, or donate to different causes or political parties and candidates. I try to use my own judgement. I buy, donate, or give when I can afford it, but I can’t always afford it.

So I end up feeling a lament that my generosity isn’t enough, or my income is too meager to make a big difference in someone’s life with my income, buy a more expensive product/service, or to support a cause I wish that I could. I buy/donate/give to a certain point, but if I go over that limit, I go into survival mode and start saying no or declining more often.

So there’s a struggle in me between altruism and selfishness. It’s partly why keep to myself much of the time, or I have to cut people off if I’m asked to give more.

The main reason I struggle with my generosity is, if I ever need financial help, I too often can’t find it. I’m lucky to have the income I have now, cuz I know there’s people living with much less.